Archive for communication skills

 

Relationship communication and the power of open communication

A relationship without open communication will inevitably give way to deception. There is no grey area. It is better to hurt another with open communication than to betray with deception. You will find that even the act of open communication prevents deeds that would normally be performed under the veil of dishonesty.

A relationship is a gentle lowering of individuality or Ego. A free flow of ideas, perceptions even insecurities should come to the surface and be discussed. In the ideal environment, no taboo or perceived craziness is outside the limit of open discussion. All taboos are society’s programming anyway- which is far from open at the present time. Even governments and companies have not recognized the power of open communication with their people.

To suddenly start being open after a long period of hiding is far more difficult than being open on a regular basis. But inevitably this line has to be crossed, and accepted. An environment suitable for revealing all is the first stage of open communication. Both parties must be willing to hear anything and refrain from allowing their Ego to jump into the fray; to judge, feel hurt or angry.

Next comes regularity. At first the impulse to be dishonest “in order to protect someone” will be strong. This is the first stage of dishonesty that is justified has being beneficial to the other person. Slowly this nurtures roots of deeper deception. If the root is cut while it is young and even little white lies are absorbed by the light of open communication – no lie can ever grow.

Does this mean one can share all thoughts, all ideas, or beliefs with anyone? It should. For now you’d get locked up or thrown into an institution as a madman. But there will come a time when society’s contract with dishonesty and illusion gives way to a deeper understanding of open communication. In the meantime there can be a selective agreement of open communication between a single couple, a single family, a single company and it’s employees, between a single government and it’s people before finally the whole world accepts the idea as norm.

Everyone may not like the idea at first, preferring to hang on to the perceived power that comes through lying. It is they who will prefer to go to war when the truth has been set free. Granted, there is a fine line between loose lips that sink ships and open communication in the spirit of greater love between two enlightened individuals. Open communication does not mean running the mouth like a loose cannon. It means selectively choosing your words in a way that will bring about greater harmony between yourself and another party. And avoiding the acts that would disrupt that harmony whenever possible. And in the rare cases where a controversial decision must be made in haste and a decision was made in error, it can quickly be discussed, accepted and learned from.

Most great tragedies begin with a small deception that gets cultivated over time. If you can learn to be open even when on the surface it appears that it will not serve you, over time you become the person that can always be depended on for the truth. And because the truth is a power sought from the depths of every Soul- anyone who possesses it will hold a position of great power. Respected, admired and even revered for their sincerity, and openness even in times when the truth is unpopular and their name risks being tarnished- they rise above the primitive contract of society and peer into a new world waiting on the horizon.

James Stinson
http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/the-power-of-open-communication-63195.html

 

Michael Noone is the publisher of http://www.topcommunicationskills.com an online resource for communications skills training for use with your relationships, family,friends and in your business…

 

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From early on in school we have been taught that listening skills are an important part of how to communicate. It is natural for humans to use listening skills to build communication skills.

Babies learn to speak through listening. We learn about things we do not know about through listening. So having effective listening skills can make you able to communicate better. You can learn how to communicate better through listening skills if you know the basics about listening.

The following four sections explain the key points to being a good listener and why they are important to communication listening.

1. Use body language to show you are listening.

Not only will body language show you are listening, but it will also help you to listen better. If you move closer you can hear better and not be distracted as easily. If you maintain eye contact you will be less likely to be distracted by something you see around you.

Also avoid fidgeting as this can show your lack of interest or that you are getting bored.

2. Repeating back parts of what someone has said to you shows them you listened.

It also helps you to comprehend what was said better. If you misunderstood this will let the speaker know and then it can be clarified. You also show you are interested by taking their words and repeating them back. It shows you were really focused on what they said.

3. Focus on the person speaking.

You should be giving you undivided attention to the person speaking. This means you are not looking for something in your purse, glancing around the room or doing some other task during a conversation.

If you are even slightly distracted you may miss something the person says or be at risk of misunderstanding them.

4. Do not interrupt the person speaking.

You should hear the other person out and wait for a break in the conversation to ask questions or express your point of view. Interrupting only shows you are more interested in your own thoughts than theirs.

These tips basically cover the ways to be a good listener. There are various takes on what is required to be a good listener. Some qualities vary depending on the situation you are in. These tips are based for those in a casual situation, such as at a party.

You should always do your best to be a good listener. If someone knows you never really listen then they will be less likely to want to talk to you again.

Try not to ignore what is said and show your interest and your communication listening skills will come across. Knowing how to communicate better through listening skills will make you an overall better comunicator and someone people want to talk to.

Peter Murphy
http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/how-to-communicate-better-with-superior-listening-skills-10296.html

 

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The two most powerful tools we have available to us in our lives are our human mind and our communication skills. With the right thinking and the right use of the skills you can create the life you really want and the relationships you desire.

People sometimes ask me: “Why is communication important?”. And you might be asking the same thing. The reply is that communication is the glue that holds together our society, your friends, your family, your colleagues at work, your neighbours…

How would it be if you were not able to communicate your thoughts and ideas to others?

How would it be it you were not able to share your experiences with your loved one?

And just imagine not being able to find solutions to a problem, or not having the skills to guide others and yourself through a crisis.

If you overlook the importance of communication, and the importance of your own ability to take charge of your life, your quality of life will be diminished. Because the quality of your communication is the quality of your life.

Do you not agree that communication skills hold the fabric of your world together? And do you not agree that improving your communication skill level makes sense so that your life becomes more fulfilled for you and everyone you love, such as your family and your friends?

Because our progress as a species, and our success, has always been dependant on our ability to work together, to cooperate, and to communicate.

With your ability to communicate you can face problems and challenges, and you can find solutions to those challenges so that everyone not just feels good about these solutions, they will also cooperate with you in the future. Because they have confidence in you and trust you.

The question about why communication is important is more a question about how much you want to create a life you want to live in, with all those you love and care about. It’s more about how much you want to increase the quality of YOUR life.

And you can start today with improving your communication skills.

 

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Feb
15

Do You Need Good Communication Skills?

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In relationships, it is important to have good communication skills. And this is true for all areas of your life. Because you relate to people at home, with your friends, at work, with your colleagues, with your family. This means you communicate all day with numerous people.

When you examine all the situations where there are misunderstandings or even conflicts, poor communication skills are usually the cause.

 

Let’s look at some basic aspects of good communication skills:

1. Be focused on what you want. This means knowing how you want any situation that you’re in to be. If you’re not clear on what you want, you could get frustrated because you may feel like going in circles.
 
2. Speak clearly and with enough volume that others can hear and understand what you say. Similarly, use the type of language that the listener is familiar with. You will then easily create rapport with them.

 

3. This brings me to the next point. Using good communication skills means that you take an interest in the other person and talk about what they’re into. This will set you apart from most people because they like talking about what they’re interested in. And usually this topic of conversation is themselves. Have you noticed? And because this is true, you can take advantage of this and practice your good communication skills.

4. Listen attentively and well . How do you listen well? Instead of rehearsing over and again what you’re going to say to the other person when they stop to breathe, you will do better if you listen to what they are saying and reflect back “keywords” that they use more than once. This will indicate to them that you’re really interested in what they’re talking about and will quickly make you a person they trust.

5. Choose your listeners. Even if you use all of the strategies I’ve outlined above, you may still feel that you’re not heard or understood. And sometimes, it has nothing to do with whether or not you’ve got good communication skills. There are some people you meet who are so wrapped up in themselves that they do not know how to listen to others, are not interested in listening and probably never will.

If you know someone like this, send them a link to this article because it may make a difference in their life, and it will definitely make a difference in yours.

6. Know your subject. Perhaps you want good communication skills to be able to influence others. When people think you know what you’re talking about, they are more likely to listen to you. In most circumstances, they will definitely listen to you if they think you’re an expert. How to become an expert is a subject for a future article I will post on this site.

Once you improve your communication skills using the suggestions just outlined, you will be aware of an almost immediate improvement in how people react to you. And in turn, your satisfaction and happiness in life will improve.


Category: Relationships: Communication

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By Peter Murphy

Would you like some great tips on how to improve communication skills? By improving your communication skills, we mean that you will become more assertive at communicating your thoughts and opinions. Can this be done? Yes, it can. And it boils down to one general rule: stop seeking other people’s approval. When you do this, you will find yourself more confident at expressing your own particular thoughts and opinions.

What are the effects of not seeking other people’s approval?

1) You become perceived as a more charismatic individual by other people.

2) You learn to say “no” when needed rather than always saying “yes” to other people.

3) You regain your peace of mind because you no longer feel the need to place yourself in a position of weakness when interacting with other people.

4) You begin to get in touch with your own point of view instead of absorbing other people’s point of view in the absence of your own.

But you may be wondering how you go about getting rid of the habit of seeking other people’s approval. Here are some tips that should help you with that. With daily practice, you will find that you will eventually be rid of the old habit.

1) Try to be aware of the times that you try to seek other people’s approval by saying things just to please them.

2) Change what you are saying to reflect the truth rather than using content that you hope will make the other person more accommodating to you. The truth may hurt, but in the long run, it is more beneficial to both you and the other person. For example, your spouse may ask you “Do I look alright to you?” as you are preparing to go out for dinner. The old habit would make you say “Oh yes, you look terrific!” when the truth is your spouse has some lipstick smeared on her cheek. Change to the new habit of being truthful and tell your spouse “You’ve got some lipstick smudged on your cheek.” The truth is oftentimes simpler to say.

3) Keep monitoring yourself for a period of at least three weeks so that switching to the new habit becomes a matter of daily practice. In time, the new habit becomes easier to use and you won’t find it so difficult anymore.

4) It helps to maintain a point system of your own. You might opt to reward yourself for learning the new habit of speaking your mind. For example, if your friend wants to borrow your car for the day, the old you would have automatically said “Oh sure, take the keys. Have fun.” even though you would have preferred not to lend the car to him because he doesn’t look after the car properly. Switch to the new habit and tell him “I’d rather not lend the car to you.” The friend might be quite persistent and keep asking day after day – the trick is to be equally persistent at saying “no, you can’t borrow it.”

The point system helps you to bolster your own confidence level because you can see how well you stand up to peer pressure. And if you reach a certain number of points, you could opt to reward yourself – maybe you could splurge on a triple-layer ice cream cone, or a new pair of jeans. The point is that it is something you would really enjoy.

As you can see, it takes time to become more assertive but it is possible. Hopefully, this article has been able to teach you how to improve communication skills.

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because it is available only at: conversation starters

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Apr
21

Communication in Your Relationship

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What else makes it real working relationship solid, both side putting in the effort.
Sharing a common interest, working towards something together. Perhaps it’s volunteering with Habitat for Humanity, Boy Scouts, local theatre, but most couples with real longevity share a common interest for the greater good. A fine example of this is Paul Newman & Joanne Woodward. Together the founded Newman’s Own, and spent much of their lives giving back to others, especially to sick children. Laughing together–it is so important to be able to laugh together, and to do it every single day. Whether you enjoy the same comics in the newspaper, read the same humorist’s columns, or watch the same goofy TV shows, having a laugh in common is a great bonding experience, and studies show that laughing every day can relieve stress and help prevent heart attacks! (Who knew?) One of the MOST IMPORTANT THINGS in a solid relationship is having SEPARATE interests as well as together time! Again, I cite Newman & Woodward–he raced cars with great passion, and she was not impressed at all, and I don’t think she ever got into one of his cars, but she supported his great passion, and he encouraged her to do the community theatre that she loved so much, and they did spend many hours involved in their separate interests. When they came together, they were were happy to have spent the time pursuing their hobbies and genuinely delighted to be back with each other again.

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Apr
19

Effective Communication Skills Video

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2 Effective Communication Skills VideoWe all listen and react depending on what we value. We might be more converned about relationships, or more about ideas or, more about results. Stuart Gelles of Success Television explains how we can more effectively communicate if we understand and relate to people from what they value.

Duration : 0:3:21

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2 4 Deadliest Communication Mistakes in IntimacyGet your relationship on track, better than ever, in ten days or less… even if your situation seems hopeless. www.TenDaysToAGoodMarriage.com Marriage counseling, relationship advice, communincation skills, love marriage sex, divorce.

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2 George Walther   Power Talking Communication Skills Training Video Preview from Seminars on DVDFor more information about the full length version of this program, please visit: www.seminarsondvd.com Communication skills training is extremely important for people in sales, management, customer service, public speaking, or any position dealing with people. In this powerful communication skills training video, expert George Walther shares the knowledge, skills, and insights necessary to take your communication skills to the next level. You’ll learn specific ideas on how to be more …

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